Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Art Inspiration...My Journey- Overcoming the Need for Validation

Making teal paint...

All of my life, I have sought to be 'approved of' by others.  Feeling the need to be validated by someone else's standards, ideas, or preferences. As you can imagine, it was confusing, exhausting and it stripped me of any individualism that I longed to identify in my own life. Pleasing people was often my number one motive for doing things.

I have been thinking about this lately. Mostly how it relates to my journey of finding my way as a creative person. I hesitate to use the word artist, although I've been told I am one. I am learning to understand that.  I'm trying not to be affected by people who don't care for what I design. (But of course I would like to create offerings that touch people's life by reflecting an elemant of beauty and truth.)

Leonardo Da Vinci was an artist. Van Gogh. Monet. Rembrandt.

And so many other wonderful, talented people that I have met through Blogland..

But NOT me.

I don't think of myself much at all in the way of an artist. I try to keep my thoughts focused on 'the what' not the 'why' or 'who' I might look like. { or not }

It's the idea. The process and the end result. It's the learning. And there's oh so much to be experienced in my heart and expressed through my hands. It has all become a means of getting to know myself better. To connect with my feelings. My memories. Experiences from my past that have shaped me. The colors that touch me deep inside. The textures that make my heart leap or almost take my breath away. Truly. No drama here. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed as I listen to my heart or marvel over pallets of beauty as I study and learn how to bring that together in my own heart, mind and with my hands.

Though it's tempting and I have to be careful not to fall back into that 'comparing myself' mindset.

I have a few goals:

* Honor God, reflect truth
*Create uplifting and beautiful offerings
*Enjoy the process 

I have to keep my heart in check and stay REAL. AUTHENTIC. {this is one of my favorite words)

adjective: authentic; adjective: auth.
  1. 1.
    of undisputed origin; genuine.
    "the letter is now accepted as an authentic document"
    synonyms:genuine, real, bona fide, true, veritable;
    informalthe real McCoy, the real thing, kosher
    "an authentic document"

How do I stay real?

* I remind myself that others may not even like what I offer
* Trust that God will guide me
*Making money is not the goal {though selling is fun and can be encouraging ...
  and I would really like to supplement our income someday,
  I don't want the selling of what I do give me a false sense of success or self}
*Stay true to myself and not allow myself to be pressured by quotas or anything else extrinsic
*Don't seek to re-create what others are doing just to feel 'safe'

{in other words, FOLLOW MY HEART. stay true to my beliefs.
remember my goals and purposes.}

These are just some simple things that I am doing and learning to understand about today. I am constantly reading and researching. It used to be validate myself. But now it's to learn and appreciate and truly be blessed by what others are doing. I don't feel the need to compare. I just take it all in.

I try to limit my time though so I have time to stay in touch with my heart voice. It's very quiet and sweet so I have to be very sensitive.

It's good to be free from so much of what to drive me. It's not a bump free road yet, but the journey is getting smoother all the time and I am grateful.

Thank you so much for stopping by and I love your sweet comments.

Blessings for your day and your journey,
Tamara XO

1 comment:

Jeff LeFevre said...

I love the paint picture! What a beautiful blob of paint! Great post my lovely ARTIST wife!